Cut Yourself a Little Slack
Progress Over Perfection
No parent gets it right all the time and that’s okay. The pressure to constantly “nail it” can be overwhelming, especially on the tough days. Instead of striving for perfection, shift your focus to being present.
Not every moment needs to be a parenting win
Give yourself permission to have off days
Your presence matters more than a perfect response
Let Go of Unrealistic Standards
Holding yourself to an impossible standard can lead to burnout, guilt, and frustration. Parenting is messy, unpredictable, and deeply human. Release the need to handle everything flawlessly.
Mistakes are part of the journey
Kids don’t need perfect parents they need real ones
Beating yourself up only adds pressure
A Mindset Shift That Helps
Try replacing this thought: “I should have done better” with “I did what I could with what I had.” This reframing can help you show yourself the same compassion you give your kids.
Create a “Reset” Routine
Tough moments hit hard and fast. When they do, having a go to reset trick can stop the spiral. Something simple: a few deep breaths, staring at the sky for two minutes, or making a cup of tea and drinking it in silence. These tiny rituals aren’t about fixing everything they’re about creating a pause, a reset point. Enough to regain a bit of control and shift the tone of the rest of your day. Find one that works and keep it in your back pocket. You’ll use it more than you think.
Keep a Mental (or Written) Highlight Reel
On tough days, your brain will try to convince you nothing good has happened. Don’t buy it. You’ve had moments big or small where you made your child laugh, feel safe, or loved. Those count. But memory can be fickle, especially when you’re running on empty.
That’s where a simple practice helps: jot down one small parenting win at the end of the day. It doesn’t need to be profound. A shared giggle, a quiet cuddle, a tantrum sidestepped. Keep those notes in a place you can find when the doubt creeps in. This isn’t about rose colored glasses. It’s about perspective and building proof that you’re doing more right than you realize.
Use Affirmations That Actually Resonate
Skip the sugar coated self talk. If it makes you cringe, it’s not helping. You don’t need mantras that sound like they came from a coffee mug you need reminders that feel real. Try something like: “I’m doing the best I can with what I have today.” Or, “This moment is hard, not forever.” Short, honest, and grounded phrases can be like handrails when your emotions are swinging. It’s less about positivity and more about anchoring yourself when you’re close to the edge. Use words that calm you, not ones that deny the struggle.
Lean Into the Power of Routine
When everything feels chaotic, structure is your friend. Establishing even a simple routine can make a noticeable difference in how you feel and how your day flows.
Why Routine Helps
Creates predictability for both you and your child
Reduces decision fatigue, especially on tough days
Offers a sense of control amid the unpredictability of parenting
Start Small: A 10 Minute Morning Routine
You don’t need a perfectly curated schedule to benefit from routine. Begin with just a few minutes in the morning that are yours alone, or shared intentionally with your child.
Ideas to Try:
A quiet cup of coffee before the house wakes up
Reading a short children’s book together to start the day with connection
Stretching or breathing exercises to release tension
Make It Repeatable
Consistency is more important than complexity. Choose 1 3 simple steps you can realistically repeat daily. Over time, your new routine becomes something to lean on not one more thing to manage.
Simplify When You’re Overwhelmed
On the rough days when the dishes are stacked, the laundry’s overflowing, and you’re running on fumes scale back. Dinner doesn’t have to be organic, gluten free, and plated like a cooking show. Scrambled eggs or cereal count. A clean floor isn’t worth yelling over. Let it go.
Parents often feel pressure to make everything look perfect, but that’s not what sticks with kids. They remember your hugs, the way you laughed at their silly jokes, not the vacuum lines in the carpet. So when things start unraveling, ask yourself: is this adding peace or pressure? Choose peace every time. Simplicity makes room for presence, and presence is what matters most.
Connect With Other Parents (Even Briefly)
Some days feel longer than others. That’s when a quick text or meme exchange with a fellow parent can shift your entire mood. Connection doesn’t have to be deep or time consuming it just has to remind you that you’re not the only one trying to keep it together. A blog post, a voice note, even a five minute vent in the group chat can go a long way.
When you need more than just a moment of solidarity, check out this practical guide on parenting with confidence. It’s packed with tools to help you feel more grounded and a little less alone.
Set a Micro Goal
Forget trying to nail the perfect day. That mindset burns you out fast. Instead, aim for small wins moments that feel doable. Maybe it’s making it to lunch without a meltdown. Maybe it’s sharing one genuine laugh with your kid. When the day feels like too much, pick just one good moment to aim for. Check it off, then find the next. Micro goals give you traction when everything else feels like mud.
Celebrate the Little Wins
Small victories matter more than you think. Getting everyone dressed and out the door? That’s a logistical feat. Calming a tantrum without losing your cool? That’s skill. These are wins, even if they don’t look impressive on paper. When the day feels heavy, giving yourself credit for what did go right isn’t just a pep talk it’s how you build endurance.
Parenting throws curveballs. Not every day ends in triumph, but recognizing those moments where you showed up, adapted, or simply held it together rewires your mindset. You’re not just surviving the day you’re building stamina for the long game.
Remind Yourself: This Season Is Temporary
Some days hit harder than others. The tantrums, the sleep deprivation, the self doubt it piles up fast. But here’s the thing: this stretch you’re in isn’t permanent. You’ve weathered storms before, and whether it felt like grit or grace that got you through, you did it. You’re still showing up. That counts for a lot.
When it feels like you’re stuck in the heavy part, zoom out. These moments, as loud or messy or frustrating as they are, will shift. They always do. And when they do, you’ll look back and see your strength more clearly than you do now.
Need help staying steady until then? This guide is worth your time: Parenting with confidence.
